Asking the Wrong Questions Nobody chooses cancer. It sucks 100% of the time. If you heard those words too, take a deep breath. You didn't decide to get cancer. I wasted too many brain cells at the beginning of my relationship with cancer trying to figure out what I did to deserve such an ugly disease. I learned it was a much better use of my time when I imagined divorcing myself from cancer and finding joy every day in spite of it. You might be wondering how in the world do you "divorce" cancer and when does the joy pop up. It takes work. Some days were easier than others. (That's the positive way of saying some days were dark and much more challenging.)